Head Above Water

NIGHT-Int.

MAMERE 1

(breaststroking)

I could not believe he was unaware of how uncomfortable I was. All I could think of was Depends and whether I would be able to pull down my hose before I, you know, started going. And there's Bill, chomping on his endive salad, regaling me with a story about some goddam raccoon in his carport, not letting me get a word in edgewise.

MAMERE 2

(breaststroking)

And he didn't even notice? Glaucoma?...Oh, this is tougher than it used to be. Let's pause after this lap.

MAMERE 1

(breathing heavily)

At least some things get easier.

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Gosh, I have so many things to write about because I haven't written in so long and so much school work to do that I have no time to write. You see the dilemma. But I am going to go swimming tonight, as it was so much fun last week. It is hard for me to keep my head above water, but it feels good.

It was my sister's birthday last week, and Sabina's last weekend here, so we spent a lot of time together, which was good. Saturday, we ate a lot of lovely food and talked. Bby came with news that Vinnie is a Rhodes scholar now (holy shiat, ps). I said goodbye to Finnie, but it has been so good with her this visit that I wasn't sad when she left, because we were in such a good place, so safe.

J was talking about that word, good, that it has many imposters but when something is good, there is really no other word for it. I have had, then, a good week. Last Sunday I tracked down a bowtie for the Russian, not the bowtie (because some dillhole bought it SUNDAY MORNING before I got there...the thing had been hanging on the racks for months and the day I go to get it, it's gone). I was so peeved. I searched for a cream coloured bowtie for hours, not even because I wanted to get it for the Russian, but more because it was driving me insane!I was pleased with the one I found and I think the Russian is too. He wore it to the CCA opening and the symphony the next day.

The CCA opening was fun, Christine did myhair and make-up, and besides losing my shit at a taxi company and arriving late, it was a lovely evening. The show is very trendy and fun, with dozens of small projects about how people interact with their urban environment. My favourite project was these velour leisure suits which had foam incorporated into them in order for them to act as cusions when you are sitting in four particular spots around LA. As in the foam is cut to take into account arm rests of a particular public bench, for example. I can't remember what they are called, but I will post it when I find it online. The crowd was also trendy and fun, but not as high fashion as the last one of these things I went to. The Russian was lovely in his bowtie.

The pretty Armenian, Nai, was there with Jessica Rabbit. Bby was the purrrrrrrfect wingman and I ended up being completely straightforward, and telling Nai that I think she is lovely, I would really like to see her again, and would she be interested. She asked about my status with the Russian, which I tried to explain, but mainly, we got along swimmingly and I cannot wait to see her again. I called her last night and had to leave a message with her mother!?, but we'll see.

The Russian was off doing private function things for most of the evening, but I called him to tell him about my success with Nai (who he also likes) and we met for a drink. He told me that he was serious about me. I ordered some drinks. I told him about my evening and we spoke quietly into each other's ears and then went back to his place...

Wednesday night, we went to the MSO. The Debussy was lovely, the Bartok cartoonish and the Beethoven captivating. I know nothing about classical music but it was lovely. There was a pretty lesbian who was the only other person other than the Russian wearing a bowtie, and we tried to track her down during intermission but she eluded us. The Russian held my hand for the whole concert and told me how pretty I looked. He also said I reminded him of his mother, twice, which was somewhat disturbing, but I think, important to him. A woman approached us on the metro platform to tell me how lovely my dress was, and how pretty I looked. I beamed. He took the metro with me, although it was faster for him to take the bus. When he got off, I saw him watching me from the middle of the platform until I rolled away.

All in all, I am a little bit on top of the world. I feel reckless. I know that everyone thinks this thing will land me flat on my arse, and I know that is a real possibility. But I am treading water and instead of feeling exhausted, I feel rejuvenated. I know the Russian means what he says, and I know it could change or shift and then he would mean that too, but I am letting it happen, bass playa.